I haven't posted in a really long time lol. A lot of those months were chaos while taking care of two children, going to school full time, and teaching full time. I new that internship time was crazy... I just hadn't been told how crazy it would be with two very small children.

But... that time has come and gone with me earning straight A's. I graduated and received my bachelor's degree in elementary education with almost straight A's. And now, I'm just spending my time subbing, and looking for a job.

Today is my two year anniversary. Two years ago today, I met my mother in law and sister in law for the first time. I couldn't stop giggling because my husband blew out the unity candle instead of his own candle. We got crazy drunk, and galavanted all over Las Vegas. Sometimes, I really really miss Las Vegas. I get a very strong urge to start planning a trip there. I remember when we were listening to a time share thing so that we could get free tickets. The guy that was trying to sell us a time share told us that people usually only go to Las Vegas one time in their life. I asked him why? He said that once they go, sure they have fun, but there isn't any reason to go back because they can basically mark it off of their list of things they want to do. I think I'm different. Forever, Las Vegas will always be special to me. I will go there again someday.

I can't explain myself very well when it comes to things like that. Memories are so important to me, which then makes places where those memories happen very important to me. Especially when it was very happy for me.

My husband is in the process of becoming sober. He's been sick for days now. Don't get me wrong, but part of me is sad for one reason. If he is truly serious about being sober, that means no more drinking together. I'm not one for drinking but I have really happy silly memories where we both have had a lot of fun on nights out drinking. Playing pool, laughing like crazy, and even crazy drunk uninhibited sex lol. Some of my happy memories. I will always enjoy those memories.

I hold some things so dear even though its from the past that sometimes I have to go revisit it just to calm my head. I'm not sure what it's about. OCD? Sometimes it feels like it. Like yesterday, I had the urge to go and see the trailer that we use to live in. The first place that Aaron and I lived together, the place where I got pregnant before we even had a bed, the stupid speed bumps that gave me contractions in the last part of my pregnancy, and the home where we brought our new born baby. I drove by it, and had the biggest urge to stop and go inside. It doesn't look like anyone lives there, but of course I didn't stop and go instead because that would break the law and I don't do that.

I have that urge for other places too. Every time I drive by certain streets I look down the road at certain houses even though the people don't live there anymore. I go to certain websites to look at and read things that hold some of my past. And for the life of me, I don't know why I do that.... sometimes it really irritates me too.

There are other things that should be important to me but aren't. The place we lived and found out that I was pregnant with Emily and brought her home to. I don't have any urge to go there. If I drive past that street, I don't look. I won't lie... that was not a very good time in my life. In fact it was stressful, and I hated much of what went on during that time. Maybe that's why that house doesn't mean anything to me.

Anyway, I find myself sitting here on my anniversary night alone because Aaron is working, and wishing that instead we were in Las Vegas making another memory for me to treasure.

So far so good!

Resolution #1 - Lose Weight

Today, I did day two of sparkpeople.com's 28 day bootcamp, and I did another 1.4 mile walk. Still trying to work on making good choices when eating, but, hey, it's still day two!


Resolution #2 - Graduation

I haven't done anything for this yet because I'm one of the lucky few who didn't get registered before the break. Some of my classmates are freaking out because they've been registered and they've already taken a look at the workload in the class. I'm jealous because I can't see the class, but I'm worried because they're freaking out and... I can't see what they see. Hopefully tomorrow I'm registered and Tuesday the class will pop up for me.


Resolution #3 - Financial Organization

I've been looking at different things that should make up a budget but I haven't actually worked on it yet.


Resoluation #4 - Organization

I folded clothes today. It doesn't really sound like organization but I'm counting it. First, we have one dresser and ALOT of clothes so I'm trying to find places for clothing while it's getting washed (or rewashed in some cases).


Resolution #5 - AJ and Emily

AJ and I went to the dollar store today to get Emily some diapers, and then I took him on my walk with me. I know he enjoys getting out of the house, even if it's just for a walk, and he was having a blast sitting in the stroller for our 30 minute walk.

Emily took a very long nap today. I think it's because she's always getting interrupted during her nap and also both kids were awake at 4 am.

Resolutions

New year, new blog title! I had to figure out a way to include Emily in the title.

The mandatory New Years resolution post. I've decided to make a resolution for different areas of my life to make sure that I'm working on bettering myself all around.

1st - I want to lose weight. My goal is to lose one pound a week, and to make sure that I am exercising at least 3 days out of the week. I started today with a sparkspeople 28 day bootcamp video, and a 1.4 mile walk.

2nd - I want to graduate in May, and then have a teaching job in August. I don't really know what goals to set for this other than to do my absolute best during internship.

3rd - I want us to be financial organized. I need to make a budget, and then we need to stick with it. That also includes saving. My goal for the first six months of the year will be to save at least $50 - $100 a month. It'll basically be all we can afford while I'm interning. I'll reevalute it as needed, but definitely by August when I'll hopefully have a job.

4th - Organization. I need to go through our things in the storage unit and here and get rid of what isn't needed and organize the rest.

5th - My kids. The order of the list isn't in order of importance. I want to make sure that I'm do whats right for my children. I'm already doing this but I want to keep doing this. With school being so demanding and just trying to survive on our tiny income, I start to feel like I'm not doing what I should for them. I can say that this is what I need to do to make sure they have a good future, but instead I'm going to stop what I'm doing and read a book or play with them. I also want to make sure that I keep up with this blog for the sole purpose it was made... to make sure that I have memories written and pictures taken for them to look back on when their older. So that being said.... a picture of each of my babies on the first day of 2011: